The real test has begun

And I am hardly prepared..

He told me to send samples, and when I asked what genres he should like to see, he told me that whatever would please me to write. So I went to have a look at their company’s website, hoping to mimic some of the writings there. But after two days of looking and of re-reading the same articles, I still cannot decide what to write about. I should like to write about something commercial, a promotion maybe for some business product, or maybe something like a coverage for an event – I’m not sure; I’m even less sure if I possess the capabilities of writing in such manners and on such topics which I have never written on before.

Nokia Kevlar.
So we’re hearing this joke that our phones are unbreakable – something like if you drop on a table, you’d best take care to see if there are any cracks on the table rather than on the phone.

Well, guess what – we’re introducing a phone made entirely out of Kevlar. Yes, even the insides are made of Kevlar.

But what about the batteries and the screen, you ask. Well, that was our question too, until the engineers told us that even those would be made out of Kevlar.

So here we have it: A epoch-defying phone that functions not only as a phone (not really), but more as a tool for hammering things or making dents in your neighbors’ mailboxes or even hitting someone you’ve hated for a long time (although we’re not sure if this is legal).

Visit our stores to try the smashing new Nokia Kevlar.

Über-Life Life Insurance: Insurance for the Uberman.
Thinking of living dangerously, but worried that you might not leave enough for your pet cat? At Über-Life Life Insurance, we respect your decisions in life, even if they are completely foolish – be it jumping off a plane with a faulty parachute or attempting to feed wasabi to a seemingly harmless sea otter, we will be more than glad to take you under our protection.

Balsam’s Bittersweet Taffy and Sweets Emporium.
Be flung into a state of euphoria, before realizing that all joys are ephemeral – that is, as soon as our candy starts to dissolve in your mouth.

We informed a society of nihilists that they are being accorded a most prestigious academic prize. We then observed their elation and their simultaneous descent into emptiness. It was at that precise moment of mixed emotions that our collection of the most bittersweet taffies and sweets came into being.

You’re sitting at table with some of your long-time friends. All of you are talking and laughing, with the occasional burst of merriment whenever one of you recalls an old joke or a pleasant memory. What a life, you think to yourself – if only this could go on forever; if only you could meet these wonderful people once more in another life.

Boutique Travel Travel Boutique.
Trips to places so exotic, you might just disappear. Remember to tell your loved ones before you leave.

Come and Sleep Hotel. Come and sleep. Need more be said? Call us if interested. If no one picks up, call later. But if it’s the late afternoon, and the weather is nice enough for a nap, don’t call.

Swindlebald’s Swivelling Chairs.
It was in the year 1984 that Samson Swindlebald spun his first swivel chair. Unlike his competitors, the rotors of his chairs were made from the smoothest metals found on earth. Today, that chair continues to spin, although we don’t really have a clue where that chair is. And so neither have we been able to replicate it entirely. But we did come close.

Finny’s Exotic Flora Floral House.
No one will ever dare call your garden boring again.

 

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